Last Day - Shamian Island

Our last full day in China was Tuesday. Calli's visa was arriving that afternoon and then we would be free to leave. 

First, here are a few pictures I meant to post earlier:

Randy and Calli at the zoo - love this! 

And our whole group having lunch after our trip to the zoo on Monday. This was a crazy lunch. 8 adults, 8 kids, one table. It was nuts! We all just laughed - everyone understands everyone else and we were just all in this together. Really like one big family! So thankful for these three families. I told someone I think one of my favorite parts about China were the families we were with - two in Fuzhou and three in Guangzhou. Hearing their stories, seeing their faith, and just knowing that they understood and were in this with us was so encouraging and helpful. I told them they made me feel normal!

Oh - and this random picture. Who knew Michelle Obama bought her pearls from this little shop next to our hotel?! If I had known that, I would have waited and bought the girls' pearls there. Crazy.

 So, Tuesday. That day we went to Shamian Island, still in Guangzhou. This is a beautiful little island, just like 3 or 4 blocks long that has a lot of European history and influence. You can't drive on all the streets, the buildings are beautiful and so are the gardens. The US consulate used to be located out here on the island, so families adopting from the US would all stay at a famous hotel here, the White Swan, and complete their child's adoption on the island. The consulate has moved now and the White Swan is under renovations, but it was so nice to get to see the island and do more shopping!

We got a picture with our guide, Grace. She was wonderful and took great care of us in GZ.

Just some pictures around the island... 

 There are also a lot of bronze statues. I think this is their view of what adoptive parents from the US look like: older, carrying multiple cameras, pushing a baby, wearing a backpack. So funny! 

 We did a little more shopping here. I wanted to find a gift to give Calli on each anniversary of her Gotcha Day until she turns 18. We found several neat items and then lots of other small things, but I think it will be neat to have something to give her from China each year.

After a long day we met our friends for Mexican food...again! This made the third time in 4 days. Then, Randy went with some of the families to the store for some groceries for the plane ride and I took Calli up to the room to give her a bath and start packing. We were alone together for about an hour and it went so well! She enjoyed her bath and didn't fuss the whole time, even when she realized Randy wasn't with us anymore. It was great. We packed and went to bed - we had to wake up at 4 the next morning to check out and start our three hour drive to Hong Kong where our first plane trip started.

And then the 24 hour long day of travel began...

 

Home!

We're finally home! I'm going to catch up on blogging, but I want to keep it in order. So, I'll finish with our last couple days in China and then our travel home. We are so glad to be home...and so tired.

We're Coming Home!

...and we couldn't be more ready. We are so excited to be heading home with our sweet Calli. We miss our girls (and Molly), we miss our house, and we're just ready to be back where things are normal. We know we'll be starting a new normal, bringing Calli into our family, but we're just ready to get started.

We have had friends and family asking about when we are arriving, so we wanted to confirm our arrival times in DFW and then in Houston here. We would LOVE for anyone who wants to come meet us and Calli at the airports in both cities to do so. We will be doing a lot of staying home and just being a family of 5 for the next (however many) days, so we'd love to get to see everyone at the airport.

We arrive on Wednesday at DFW at 4:04pm. We are flying on United. Right now they have our gate as E5.

We arrive in Houston at Hobby on Thursday at 1:30pm. Flying Southwest.

There are a few things we've talked about that we will be doing with Calli and wanted to communicate those here as well. Some of these we were just waiting to see how she transitioned, so we're able to talk about them a little better now that we have had her for a whole week. We've read lots of books and lots of other people's adoption stories and studied a lot about attachment. Calli is attaching well to Randy, but it has certainly not been what we expected in regards to her attachment with me. There are a few things that are recommended for when you bring an adopted child home, so we'll be doing some of those that fit us for awhile.

One thing is that we will be the only ones to care for Calli for awhile. This means holding her, feeding her, diapering her - Randy and I will be the ones to meet all her needs. She needs to see us as her primary caregivers. Having been in an orphanage the first 10 months of her life and then with a foster family, and now with us, she has had a ton of change in her whole 19 months. We have seen her walk off easily from us, walk up to strangers for food, and walk up to others with her arms up for them to hold her. Since she isn't doing much of this even with me yet, we need to establish that first before we allow her to go to other people. So if she does this with you, you can give whatever you have for her to Randy or me and let us be the ones to give it to her.

It may seem like Calli is very friendly and outgoing and does well when in groups of people. But, if she is outgoing and affectionate with strangers, this can be a sign of "indiscriminate affection" and can show that she is not completely attached to anyone. If she comes up to you for something, please point her back to us.

We'll be staying at home a lot. We notice a huge difference in Calli when she is just with us in our hotel room and when we take her out in public. This is called "cocooning" and is honestly something I wondered if we would need to do. We definitely see the need for it now. So please come see us, take Kendall and Cooper for play dates, and be patient when we just need to be home as a family. We've been so overwhelmed by your prayers and encouraging words - please please continue those as we come home. We're so ready to be home, but we also realize that this next part could be harder than what we've experienced so far. Establishing a new normal.

We'll also be doing a few other things differently than we did with Kendall and Cooper as far as parenting, care and discipline. Adoption is just different than having children biologically. We're still learning what all this looks like.

We just could not be more thankful for the community of friends and family God has given us. We feel so blessed and so undeserving of all your love and prayers and sweet words. We can't wait for Calli to know the love that is already waiting for her. Thanks so much for being respectful of these boundaries as we transition. We're still figuring out what this looks like, but we know that for sure we want to be the two most important people in Calli's life and we need to teach her that through things that are tangible to her - holding, affection, food, caring for physical needs. We love you guys. Thanks for your love for us!

My new friend Jenny wrote a great blog about this before they brought their son home. I thought she explained things well - here's a link. Jenny, thanks for being such an encouragement to me these past two weeks. I told Randy the other day I wanted to come through the computer screen and hug you. I'm thankful you understand all this and can speak to it all from a few weeks down the road!

Consulate Appointment, Zoo, and a Cruise!

We have had a very big day! Today was our consulate appointment - the day all these last 14 months have led up to! Today we took an oath on behalf of Calli, we submitted more paperwork to the consulate, and her US visa was issued! We should receive it tomorrow and then we are FREE TO LEAVE! We are so excited and ready. Then the only thing waiting to make Calli a US citizen is for her feet to touch US soil. So when we touch down in San Francisco on Wednesday, she will officially be a citizen and we will be DONE. We wore our red, white, and blue to celebrate today. :)

 We weren't allowed to take pictures inside the consulate, but we got this one out in the lobby. I got a little emotional taking the oath! We were there with 11 other adoptive families and it was the culmination of a lot of work. So relieved to be finished!

 From there our group went to the Guangzhou zoo! We had an early morning getting up for our consulate appointment so Calli was pretty done by then. We are also noticing a huge difference between her behavior in our hotel room and when we go out. It's almost like it's too much and she just fusses and gets upset when we get out. In our room she is happy and giggly and talkative and even more friendly towards me. Now we understand the reason for "cocooning" once you get home! We'll be spending a lot of time at home letting her get adjusted.

 

 

Tonight we had a dinner cruise on the Pearl River. Calli wore one of the new dresses we bought her when we were out shopping yesterday - so cute!

 Our whole group! We have enjoyed getting to know everyone and hearing their stories. Plus it's just good to be with other people who are experiencing the same things you are. Except the family on the far left. They are the ones adopting two baby girls at once and we just can't even imagine their level of tired. Such awesome families!

 

 

Here are Randy and Calli on the boat! Randy joked that we can make a scrapbook of Dad and Calli pictures in China - he is the only one ever holding her, so all the pictures are with him. :)

 

 The tallest building in Guangzhou! The lights were very cool and constantly changed colors. Very neat!

 Some kind of outdoor theater or stadium.

Back inside we watched some entertainment. Randy and I laughed a lot at this - it was just kind of random and very funny. But then Calli heard the music and started dancing. She loves to dance and starts rocking back and forth anytime she hears music. She will fit in well in our crazy family!

Stink. I had a video I was trying to post of Calli dancing, but the internet is too slow here. I will try to post it on facebook or just wait until we get home. She's so cute dancing to the crazy lady's music!!
 

Sunday in GZ

Quick post before bed - tomorrow we have an early morning! We had a laid-back day today. All that was on the agenda was shopping with our group. We had breakfast and then met in the lobby. Look at how cute this baby is!!

 We went to the pearl and jade markets and a few other stores. We were able to pick out pearl necklaces and bracelets to give to the girls someday. We were buying straight from the wholesalers so everything was very very much less expensive than in the States! I enjoyed picking out the strands of pearls and then watching the girl string them together.

 

We also went to a store to buy traditional silk Chinese dresses for the girls. They will be so cute in them!

We went to a few other stores and then back to the hotel for naps. After Randy and Calli napped we went exploring around the hotel. We found a playground and an indoor playroom!

 

She wasn't too sure about the slide, even with Baba.

She loved the "ball pit."

We went back to the Mexican food restaurant for dinner and then stopped at Starbucks on the way back. We ended the day by Skyping with Kendall, Gracie, Gigi and Peeps! Tomorrow is our consulate appointment, zoo trip, and dinner cruise on the Pearl River!

He is Faithful

When we received Calli's referral in late November, I blogged about the first referral we received and had to turn down. If you haven't read about that, you can catch up here. This was a very hard time for us but it was also one of the biggest times in our lives we felt dependence on God and assurance that he had a plan for our family and for this precious child.

We are with three other Lifeline families here in GZ. Yesterday was our medical appointment, and the first time that we were really able to be with the other families and hear their stories. There is one family who brought their two older sons with them and is adopting two little girls from China, ages 1 and 2. Two girls, two different provinces. They have had such the week. With the time we have had, Randy and I just keep looking at each other marveling at this family who has two new babies.

When we were checking in, we had to fill out some paperwork about our child, and one of the questions was what their medical special need was. I heard the dad of one of these two girls saying one of the girls had a skin condition. It just caught my attention because of our first referral, so I started looking at the little girl who was in the carrier on her mom. I mentioned it to Randy, but it was pretty hectic, we were starting to move to the exam rooms and it was a little bit before we were able to talk to the parents. When we did have a few minutes to sit and wait, I asked the mom what her baby's skin condition was. She told me it was EB - same as the little baby we got the referral for first. My heart started racing as I asked her how old she was and what her name was.

It's her.

They were given her file right after we were and they accepted it. They weren't sure, like we weren't sure, how severe the EB would be, but it is still only presenting on her hands and ankles, like it was back in November. It doesn't look to be severe at all.

What in the world are the odds of that??! I know I can't really call her "our baby," but our baby, the referral we struggled to turn down, is here with us, in our group, and most importantly is with her forever family! And we were given the privilege of knowing them, seeing them, and seeing the completion of this story! Praise God!

Out of all the families adopting from China, all the agencies they could be adopting through, and then all the weeks they could have been traveling, they are here with us in our group of four families. Randy and I just keep looking at each other shaking our heads. When we realized this there in the medical office, both of us just broke down crying. I was sitting there, sobbing and hugging her mom, and she kept saying, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" I told her, "No! We are so thankful for you! We prayed for you, we have prayed for her, and we prayed that she would have a family because we knew we were not her family! We are so thankful!" And now she is where she should be and Calli is in our family where she should be. God's sovereignty and his goodness overwhelms me.

Amy, how's that for seeing how God used all of that in our story!? Do you remember when you said that to me back when we were hurting so much? He is so faithful and we are so thankful to just be able to watch.

This has been such a reminder to me that "he who began a good work in you will be faithful to bring it to completion" (Phil. 1:6). I was praying this afternoon while Randy and Calli were napping, and God reminded me of this verse. This is hard. I don't really know how to walk these roads, but I can rest knowing that because God began this work in us, he will be faithful to complete it. In us, in Calli, and in our family. This gives me strength, it gives me rest and it gives me great joy to continue walking, even when I can't see much of the road ahead.

Praise you, Father! Thank you for giving this baby a family. Thank you for allowing us to see this part of her story and know that she is in a family forever. Thank you for Calli and that she is ours. I am so thankful for your faithfulness and goodness to us. I love you!

Goodbye Fuzhou...Hello Guangzhou!

We have had another full two days so I have lots of pictures to add! Yesterday was a super long day of traveling, so we crashed when we finally made it to our hotel last night around midnight. This morning started early, so this is the first chance I've had to sit down and blog.

We are so thankful to be in Guangzhou at the Garden hotel now! Yesterday was our last day in Fuzhou, and the day when we were given Xiao Fei's Chinese passport. That is the reason we had to be in her province five days - that's how long it takes to be issued the passport. So, adoption on Monday, passport on Friday.

We tried on a shirt I bought for Calli before we left. We thought she was going to be in 24 month or 2t clothes, but everything has been too big! I brought a few 18 month things so we've been recycling those a lot. This outfit is 2t and we tried it on and it wasn't too big! I love the shirt - it says "Smile" but when I tried to take her picture, she gave me a big scowl! Ha!

Last breakfast at the Lakeside hotel. We loved our window seat each morning looking out to the lake! And Calli has loved their waffles.

 

 We had the rest of the morning to ourselves to get packed and ready to leave. We were able to Skype with the girls who we are missing so so much!
We got everything back in our three suitcases and then checked out. Penny met us and the two other families with us in a meeting room with a police officer who was there to give us our passports.

 She also gave us our certificate of adoption! This is a nice red book with our official paperwork and picture of the three of us in it. So cool!

We loved our guide Penny! She was such a big help and became a great friend this week. We're going to miss her when we're in Guangzhou! She loved Xiao Fei and even bought a Chinese doll to give to her.  

We made the hour long drive to the airport, and then had to wait there for several hours. Our flight was delayed. It is not easy to keep a toddler entertained in the airport - especially one that is still trying to decide if she even likes you. :) By the time we got on the plane it was almost 9:00. Randy put her in the carrier and she fell asleep. She slept for the first thirty minutes and then ate the last half of the flight. She was so good! We were very thankful. We were in two of three seats and there was a very nice man sitting on Randy's other side. He told him at the end of the flight, "You are a good father." I agree, sir. :)

 

And then....when we got to our hotel in GZ, this girl was a new baby! She was laughing so much, babbling more than we've ever heard, smiling, and even happier with me than she's ever been. It really was like someone had flipped a switch. We have heard that sometimes they loosen up a lot when you move from the first hotel - maybe they associate it with a traumatic time and realize that you aren't going to leave them. We loved seeing more of her personality - even though it meant she wasn't ready to go to bed at midnight when we were! I have video of her playing in bed - I'll try to post it if the internet here will let me.

 

Our hotel is very very nice. It is actually a suite, so there is a sitting room and office, and then a separate bedroom. So nice! We're so thankful this is where our agency puts their families - it will be a very comfortable five days here.

 There is a shade that electronically rolls up and down on this big window into the bathroom! And there is a crib in this room again for Calli - not that she'll use it. ;)

The sitting room.

 

 

 The foyer. Crazy!

 

So after too short of a night's sleep, we woke up to eat breakfast and get ready for the consulate medical appointment. This is required by the US embassy before they will give Calli her visa on Tuesday. GZ is where the US embassy is, so it is where any American family adopting from China ends their adoption. So walking into the breakfast buffet this morning was like walking into an adoption oasis - there were tons of American families with Chinese babies! We actually felt normal and loved seeing all these newly created families. Very, very cool.

We have three other families with us specifically in our adoption group. We are already loving them all so much and have a very cool story to share that I will blog about later. The way God connects things is just amazing!

All the American families adopting this week in China were at this medical clinic for their exams. It was a very full room of parents and babies!

The children had to go to three different rooms to be checked - we waited a long time but once we were taken back for the actual three exams, it didn't take long. She didn't love any of them but they were fast.

 

 And look what was in the lobby! I think wine in doctor's offices in the states could really catch on.

 After a short trip to the store for some groceries, all four of our families went to lunch together....at a MEXICAN RESTAURANT! I'm not sure if you can tell how excited we were - it was so good and we just wanted to order one of everything. Randy said we will be eating here several more times. And all God's people said AMEN.

 

Our hearts are full and our bodies are tired. We're heading out to find dinner and explore more of the hotel. Tomorrow we go shopping!